It’s crazy the love you have for a child.
When I was pregnant with my first child, so many people told me about the overwhelming love I would feel as soon as I delivered my baby.
The truth is, I didn’t really! It kind of grew.
I think a dramatic emergency C -Section, followed by two blood transfusions and an infection for both me and baby, left us in isolation for a week and I was very underwhelmed.
I remember thinking, where is this big love feeling they all talk about?!
As the next week past I found myself, staring at his little fingers and toes and gradually falling in love with my little boy.
To this day, when I see him running up to me at the nursery, I get a little flutter in my tummy, I just cannot wait to see him! I bend down onto his level so he runs straight into my arms and I kiss him until I’ve had enough!
Within 10 minutes of course he drives me crazy! -)
The same occurred when I had my little girl! Most mothers want a little girl, or that’s what I remember from being a little girl anyway.
After falling pregnant the second time, my first born was only 6 months old so I was in shock for most of my pregnancy. When she was born, I just thought, ‘Ok, let’s just crack on! ‘
Weeks flew by and I could not believe how blessed I was to have one of each at the age of 40 and 41.
I was in love all over again, When she runs to me at nursery I pick her up and spin her around and kiss her until I, not her, have had enough! -)
As soon as they’re asleep, I miss them. The minute I go on stage I think of them and want to go home 🙂
Remembering how this all began, meeting their daddy 5 years ago and falling madly deeply in love with someone I thought would have been enough for me.
The fire in my belly, the passion we had, the late nights, lazy mornings, singing, drinking, dancing, fresh coffee mornings, long late night chats were everything my new life was about.
We had a ball and just had to be in each other company all of the time!
I was in my late 30’s and was the happiest I had ever been!
After 6 months together I was pregnant, a great pregnancy spent with just the two of us and then, BAM BAM one after the other.
We rarely get time to look at each other now, maybe just the odd touch of a hand or brushing past one another on the stairs.
We have to make actual time for one another.
For the first time in months and months, we went out for dinner with some friends recently, wine tasting, the wine was flowing, I was telling my funny stories and as I looked across the table, I could see he had tears of laughter in his eyes, and I thought…Awe see, THIS IS WHAT WE USED TO DO! I LOVED IT!
Speaking to him after, he said the same, He looked at me, saw me laughing and remembered how it used to be.
Now I have three loves in my life and I love them all, in different ways ! That’s true love right there. <3